Im at work now..well..."work". Today is retarded (happily). All experiments got suspended, so I cant do any of my western blot. Safety inspectors are coming today, that's the main reason for the suspending. NUS needs to check all labs for their current safety conditions and if required, upgrade the safety of that labs. Paeds (pronounced peeds)labs being one of them of course. Renee wont be coming for the next 3 days, away on course. HEhehehe, only got ELIZA to do liao. Can only do when the officers finished their inspections of course..:p This should continue for the next three days....hopefully...hehe

Juz lunched at 11:45 today. Haha..so shiok. So far, my morning's work only consist of labelling what's inside the flammable/corrosive cupboard. Quite nicely done I would say. :) I found another canteen in NUS! Rather, jm brought me there. Ryan eugene was there, hushie (nick for peishan, didnt know how it originated though) was not. Recommanded to eat the "zhen zong yao cai huang di zi"..cost me $3 only! Wooo, cheap and nice, liked it. Oh, didnt mentioned where it was. George park izzit? Dunno the name, the busstop before/after shuttle bus terminal. Hmmm, i think still got some canteen to seek out. But that's sufficient, arts, science, business, engineering, NUS staff, George park/hostel...got 6 liao. Hehe

Was kinda reciting that i can eat ultra slowly today..haha. In a happy mood i guess, no supervisor, go back also nothing to do, so can lunch for 3 hrs!! Ok..maybe 2..:p Anyway..planned to hv lunch from 11:45 to 12:45 with jm they all, and then "continue" with fiona they all till 1:45. But fiona they all eating lunch with their supervisor..so bo bian. No lunch spree le..haha. Abit embarassed by jm they all when i mentioned eating with fiona. They keep going: "OH....ya..eat with FIONA"..=x

Hurting now, dunno y. Thinking back as i type...was it this type of things that can break or form a relationship? Not that i got anything with her, but made me think back on faye and me. Didnt want to believe this, but i feel the pressure from friends in school impacted her alot. So much that it drastically hv an effect on the initial outcome of her being unhappy. We all hope in a relationship, it would get recognized and applauded by the surronding. Maybe that feeling explains why i no longer think teasing new couples is correct. It sort of create an unconsious pressure on them. Blame that intiuation on my hypersensitivity but that's juz my way of following Jesus and my idea of "pass love and care to everyone". This somewhat negative feeling i got from their baseless teasing is further supported when i was visiting her blog. Wanted to post a comment back, but she disabled anoymonous comments. In other words, u hv to be a livejournal.com user to comment. What's the word to describe this feeling? Dejected? Does this mean another possible nice friendship is being ruined by juz trying to be more friendly? True, i admit im not usually so friendly to other girls as an example, but muz i explain y i feel that way towards her? Its not im attracted to her romantically, its more to i saw a former me in her. One who could make comments without pondering so much and yet strike the correct note in the song of communication. I recall sec sch, where i felt no actual hate towards anyone, juz disgust to inconsiderate and rude juniors. Being free and truthful in my conversations, feeling happy seeing other people happy. A common saying goes: Its the thought that counts...i thought being true in my love to faye is enough. She showed me otherwise. Thinking of it in a immature way, her bf's way of crying out and begging her to stay was actually right. Rather, it actually worked. One is me being not experienced enough in the field of love...some may say. I really used to think that thought is enough. Now, i think action speaks louder than words. Meng, do u understand? It's not that i cant forget her...im caught in a crossroad. I dont know to hate her anot. Hate as in hate...cos no one has made me felt the way i feel now. Can you imagine? You followed a thinking in life, stuck and comfortable to it. Suddenly, a person comes along and totally crushed your picture on life. I no longer know what to follow....wat to do, wat is deemed appropiate at the correct time. That's the hurt feeling. Darn, shouldnt be tearing..but cant help it. U can also say I cant take it that i lost her to another...._____ (i cant describe the feeling) person which i feel i shouldnt. Or maybe.....my god juz forsaked me.

`outz